EPISODE 1x03 - SCREWBY
[VO – all on radio]
MISFIT TWO ONE
Time on station, three zero mikes, holding at three Cherubs southwest, holding area
Chevy, carrying four Hellfires…
RECON THREE
Misfit Two One, this is Recon Three. Solid copy on check in. Stand by for six-line.
[00:00:23]
Bravo is camped in a field, checking their Humvees.
(In the background:
MARINE 1
We're on a sealed base.
JACKS
Got any extra batteries for the 119?
PATRICK
Grab all the extra drivers, fill up the vehicle together.
MARINE 2
Check the air filter on that Humvee.
MARINE 3
Ampusel, grab me a donkey dick.
MARINE 4
Damn run-flats.
MARINE 3
Grab me Dirty Earl!
CARISALEZ
I can fix anything from a screen door to a broken heart.)
Bravo Two One work on their Humvee.
COLBERT
Trombley, did you eat?
TROMBLEY
Uh. Yes, Sergeant.
COLBERT
You hydrated?
TROMBLEY
[OS] Yes, Sergeant.
COLBERT
Have you defecated?
TROMBLEY
No, Sergeant.
PERSON
[OS] Fuck!
COLBERT
Trombley, we have a long day ahead of us. I need you to take a dump now before we
get on the road.
PERSON
[OS] Hey, before you shit, hand me the bolt cutters.
Griego walks up to the Humvee.
GRIEGO
Outstanding job yesterday, gentlemen.
COLBERT
Can I help you with something, Gunny?
GRIEGO
Sergeant, yesterday we had a trial by fire.
HASSER
[OS] Come on.
GRIEGO
I want you to know, Brad, that I'm here for you and your men.
HASSER
[OS] Come on!
GRIEGO
Are there any combat stress reactions anyone needs to talk about? Remember, I'm
certified combat stress instructor.
HASSER
Fuck, fuck! [banging against his gun] It did it again.
MARINE
[OS] Hey Darnold, we need those windows cleaned!
COLBERT
No, we're good, Gunny. But we would be a lot better if you were getting us the gun
lube and batteries we need. That might do it for my combat stress.
HASSER
Yeah, mine too!
Griego begins to walk away towards Two Two.
MARINE 2
[OS] Dirty Earl, you up for worm dirt?
PATRICK
[OS] Why didn't you do it first?
REYES
[OS] I don't know, Sarge.
PATRICK
[OS] Rudy, you ain't got no goddamn common sense.
REYES
[OS] I know, brother.
GARZA
[OS] Sergeant, the spare caught a bullet too.
ESPERA
[OS] Fuck!
CHAFFIN
Ready to kill, Gunnery sir?
REYES
Stay hard, James.
Colbert climbs on top of the Humvee to inspect the Mark-19.
HASSER
That's where it's hanging up. Now I get off maybe ten rounds before it jams.
COLBERT
Yeah. This shit is totally ineffective in these conditions. We need LSA. [to Fick
who gets up on the Humvee as well] Lieutenant. Sir, the main weapon on your point
vehicle is unreliable. Given the prevailing climatic conditions, using this lubricant
is like trying to buttfuck a virgin underaged Phuket whore with chalk when KY is
clearly called for, sir.
FICK
You'll have to deal with it, Sergeant. We have four more towns to assault through
today. [jumps down from the vehicle] You want logistics, join the army. Marines
make do.
Griego walks by another Humvee.
GRIEGO
Marines, I just want you to know, the company commander feels that it was our team
that scored the touchdown yesterday for Godfather.
BRYAN
Of course Godfather's happy. He's trying to get his full bird on our backs.
STAFFORD
At least I got to bust my cherry.
BRYAN
My point is, we gotta follow Godfather wherever he leads, no matter how fucked up
it happens to be.
PATRICK
Sure do.
BRYAN
Yo Stafford, yesterday we ran the gauntlet with no ass and no air, and for what?
Fuckin' artillery blew the shit outta that town after we rolled through it.
Wright walks up with his camera.
PATRICK
We're reconnaissance Marines. Swift, silent and deadly.
STAFFORD
[OS] Hooray.
PATRICK
And Godfather knows this. And he knows when he sends us into the shit like yesterday,
we'll probably come out on top. 'Cause we're the best. But that don't make it right.
BRYAN
Hey Beaver Hunt, why are you even here? I mean, after yesterday any cognizant person
with a speck of common sense would have caught the first truck south.
Trombley walks up and hands Stafford back the ammo box that has been converted into
a shitter.
TROMBLEY
Thanks.
STAFFORD
Yo! Yo, son, you shit on my shitter.
TROMBLEY
Just wipe it off or something.
Stafford tosses the shitter back at Trombley.
STAFFORD
Yo, Trombley, this shitter's the only luxury I got out here!
BAPTISTA
[speaks in Portugese]
STAFFORD
Screwby.
Trombley walks away.
PATRICK
[OS] Devil dog, your aim sucks.
BRYAN
[OS] Hey Pappy, if Lance Corporal Trombley's as good with his SAW as he is with
his shitter, I think team one has issues.
The men laugh.
[00:04:03]
Godfather holds a command meeting.
PATTERSON
Is it correct to surmise from your sitrep, sir, that we're gonna be rolling through
these towns with a lot of ass today?
FERRANDO
Yes, Captain. We got kudos directly from General Mattis I might add, for punching
through yesterday where RCT One failed to go. But now it looks like we're back to
being one unit among many. And unfortunately, when we're rolling with the Regimental
Combat Team, we can get lost in the middle of all that ass. The only way we're gonna
get back into the game and score like we did yesterday is to find another mission
where we can break off. And, Captain Patterson, you can depend on Godfather to look
for any opportunity to get us back into the game.
Schwetjie laughs. Patterson looks at him quizzically.
FERRANDO
[OS] Count on it. Now, gentlemen, keep your powder dry.
[00:04:44]
Fick walks up to Colbert's Humvee.
FICK
[handing Colbert a can] Present for you. LSA. Scammed some off the guys in RCT One.
COLBERT
Sir, not to get homoerotic about this, but I could kiss ya.
Fick laughs and walks away.
COLBERT
Walt! Get that Mark-19 properly lubed.
HASSER
Now we're talking about killing some motherfuckers.
MARINE
[OS] Matt, hurry up and get off the fucking dirt. We gotta go.
[00:05:20]
Bravo drives down a road by some fields.
COLBERT
[OS] This place gives me the creeps.
PERSON
[OS] Yeah, those guys waving at us are probably the same ones who tried to kill
us yesterday.
They drive by a burnt out truck.
PERSON
[OS] Damn, homes.
COLBERT
[OS] Hit with RPGs.
PERSON
Yeah, a buddy of mine in One Seven had to fucking clean up a Humvee that got hit
like that. Said he found the driver's fingers in the engine compartment.
WRIGHT
How did they know they were the driver's fingers?
PERSON
'Cause they were still gripping the steering wheel, fucknuts.
They pass some dogs in the field.
TROMBLEY
We oughta shoot some of these dogs.
COLBERT
Trombley, I keep telling you we don't shoot dogs. We shoot people. And we generally
only shoot people if we have to.
TROMBLEY
I'm afraid of dogs.
PERSON
You're afraid of dogs? What, were you bitten in your formative years?
TROMBLEY
My dad was once. The dog bit him and my dad jammed his hand down the dog's throat,
ripped up his fucking stomach.
PERSON
Where did we find this guy, man?
TROMBLEY
I like cats.
They continue driving.
[00:06:57]
Colbert and Kocher scope out a hamlet.
COLBERT
[OS] Remember how the kids would come running out to us in Afghanistan?
KOCHER
[OS] Yeah.
FICK
[on radio] Hitman, this is Hitman Two. Eyes on the village confirms no enemy presence.
Bravo Two One Alpha watch McGraw picking up an AK from a dead Iraqi soldier. Lilley
films.
LILLEY
Captain America, brah. Winning the war one souvenir at a time, right?
FICK
[on radio] Hitman Actual, this is Hitman Two. Do you read?
ESPERA
Shit, get that on video?
LILLEY
Fuck yeah.
LEON
Fucking scumbag, man.
ESPERA
Hey, That's Bravo Three's commander.
Everyone laughs.
McGraw walks up to Colbert and Kocher.
COLBERT
Check it out.
MCGRAW
Sergeant! For the life of me, I could only find a black one. Have you located any
red ones?
KOCHER
No, sir.
MCGRAW
If you do, you'll be sure to let me know?
KOCHER
Yes, sir.
Colbert laughs as McGraw walks away.
Christeson watches the hamlet through his binoculars while Stafford sketches it.
STAFFORD
PFC Christeson, how far do you make it from the berm to the edge of that hut?
CHRISTESON
About 100 meters. 120.
STAFFORD
Not bad. About 225. See that beehive-shaped thing?
CHRISTESON
Yeah.
STAFFORD
That's where they cook their bread. It's always gonna show hot in a thermal. [shows
Christeson his sketch of the hamlet] It's all about the windows and doors, man.
Entrances and exits.
CHRISTESON
Screwby.
Kocher and Colbert continue to observe the hamlet.
KOCHER
Brad?
COLBERT
Yeah?
KOCHER
I'm, uh, concerned about Captain America.
COLBERT
Mmmhmm.
A truck pulls up, and some Marines get out.
KOCHER
Those guys are with RCT One.
RCT ONE MARINE
Move, move, move!
The Marines set up a position outside the hamlet and begin firing at it.
COLBERT
What the fuck?
KOCHER
We don't have comms with that unit!
COLBERT
Fuck, that's women and children. [standing up and yelling] Cease fire! Cease fire!
Christeson raises his rifle and aims.
COLBERT
Do not engage!
Stafford knocks Christeson's rifle down.
STAFFORD
Hold your fire, hold your fire!
Schwetje drives up.
COLBERT
[on radio] All Hitman Victors, we've been observing this hamlet. It's only women
and children.
Schwetje attempts to get out of his vehicle but is yanked back by his radio cord.
COLBERT
[into radio] Do not engage.
Griego films as Schwetje fires a grenade towards the hamlet.
MARINE
[on radio] Ten seconds.
COLBERT
[shouting towards Schwetje] Sir, they're shooting that hamlet in error! Sir, we
don't have any comms with RCT One and they're shooting that hamlet in error!
Schwetje reloads and fires another grenade.
MARINE
[on radio] Laser on. Spot. Enrage Seven One is at heading 030. Link them up. Cleared
hot. Seven One, missile away.
Explosions rock across the hamlet.
PATRICK
[on radio] Hitman Two, this is Hitman Two two. Who cleared that helo hot?
FICK
[on radio] This is Hitman Two. Nothing on our nets. Over.
Colbert walks back towards Kocher away from the smoking remnants of the hamlet.
PATRICK
[on radio] Interrogative, does anyone have positive ID on enemy personnel there?
FICK
[on radio] Unaware at this time. Over.
MARINE
[on radio] Enrage Seven One is off left, egressing south. Standing by for BDA.
MARINE 2
[on radio] Roger. Good effect on target. Building destroyed.
KOCHER
They fucking got good effect on target.
MARINE 1
Enrage Seven One copies. Good effects, one building destroyed.
[00:10:11]
Wright and Espera talk by the Humvees.
ESPERA
Dip?
WRIGHT
Yeah, thanks.
ESPERA
Dawg, we was like, 13 or 14 and we were pedaling around in this neighborhood I grew
up in, just east of LA. We saw some cholos from another hood. And we thought we
was all hard gangbanger wannabe so we started saying, "Fuck off, yo! Fuck off,"
throwing and flashing signs to them and stuff. So they started throwing down on
us. Wah! Wah! Wah! Wah! Kicking our little asses. Then some of the older dawgs from
our hood come out, grab those fools, took one behind the Tastee Freez. They stabbed
him up with a screwdriver. Killed that cholo. See, generally white people, they
don't drag a dude behind the Tastee Freez and stab him to death with a screwdriver.
So after that day I decided, I'm gonna hang with white people.
WRIGHT
[nods] Well, here you are. Chaffin! Excuse me. [walks over to Chaffin] Chaffin,
um, did you get a picture of my girlfriend from Leon?
CHAFFIN
I don't think so.
WRIGHT
Straight blonde hair, brown eyes?
CHAFFIN
Did she have a big stain on her face?
WRIGHT
No.
CHAFFIN
Yeah. Haven't seen her.
COLBERT
Poke! [gestures for Espera to come]
Fick leads a meeting around the hood of a Humvee.
FICK
This town Ar Rifa runs right down on the MSR for two klicks. Must be seventy-five
thousand people in it. Our mission is to haul ass pass it.
ESPERA
After that, what's next? Sir?
FICK
Haul ass through the next one, hope the Iraqis keep their heads down.
COLBERT
Sir, in that last hamlet, all it took was one shot. That was just an undisciplined
grunt from RCT One. Everybody opened up, and schwacked it over nothing.
ESPERA
Hey, we can only keep our own honor clean, dawg. What these other motherfuckers
do in this big wide AO ain't on us.
LOVELL
Yeah, it's hard enough to keep our own guys out of the shit. We can't be worrying
about the rest of the world.
COLBERT
Yeah, I know you all saw our own CO trying to fire off a 203 round in the middle
of all that.
LOVELL
[OS] Fucking Encino Man.
ESPERA
[scoffs] But he missed though.
LOVELL
Badly.
COLBERT
[OS] Yes, that's just -
FICK
Look, Brad, can't live in the past. You need to snap to. We got a lot of shit ahead
of us.
COLBERT
Roger that, sir.
The meeting disperses.
WYNN
[OS] Mount up!
[00:12:36]
Bravo Two drive down a dirt road.
FICK
[on radio] All Hitman Two Victors, quick hold to herringbone, break. Hitman Three
has fallen behind.
Bravo Two halts, and Marines get out and set up a parameter.
ESPERA
[on radio] Hitman Two, Two One Bravo set.
PATRICK
[on radio] Two Two, set.
STAFFORD
[singing] With a little bit of uh-uh
And a little bit of uh-uh
STAFFORD AND CHRISTESON
[singing] With a little bit of
And a little bit of uh-uh.
STAFFORD
[singing] I was like, good gracious check on my
STAFFORD AND CHRISTESON
[singing] tracers
STAFFORD
[singing] So dangerous trying to
STAFFORD CHRISTESON
[singing] show patience
STAFFORD
[sings] And looking for the right time to shoot my steed
CHRISTESON
[singing] Mmm
STAFFORD
[singing] Catch them when they run and
STAFFORD CHRISTESON
[singing] hit the back of their knees
STAFFORD
[sings] I'm leaving, please believe me
STAFFORD CHRISTESON
[singing] Oh!
STAFFORD
[singing] Me and the rest of my heathens, probable– [asks] Yo, man, how'd that line
go?
CHRISTESON
[OS] Q-Tip!
STAFFORD
What?
CHRISTESON
Looks like two men in black pajamas, creeping along at our nine o'clock. Two hundred
meters.
STAFFORD
Are they armed?
CHRISTESON
I think so. Should I light them up?
STAFFORD
Yo, Gunny! Christeson got two foot-mobiles, maybe with weapons. Two hundred meters
to our nine o'clock.
WYNN
If they got weapons, light them the fuck up.
Christeson fires at the foot mobiles.
COLBERT
[on radio] Hitman Two Three, this is Two One. Interrogative, what are we engaging?
BAPTISTA
[on radio] Hitman Two One, this is Two Three, what are we shooting?
Fick runs over.
FICK
You're shooting too high.
PERSON
[on radio] All Hitman Two Victors…
Christeson adjusts his fire.
FICK
There you go.
WYNN
[OS] Bravo Three is ready to push. We're Oscar Mike.
MARINE
[OS] Go, go!
FICK
Let's go, guys.
WYNN
[OS] Battalion is rolling.
FICK
[OS] Maintain suppressive fire.
MARINE
[OS] Let's go, let's go, let's go!
MARINE 2
Mount up!
FICK
Go go go!
Everyone returns to their vehicles and starts their engines.
FICK
[into radio] Hitman, this is Hitman Two. Our command Victor's made contact with
an RPG team. We have engaged them. How copy?
WYNN
[OS] Let's go! We're Oscar Mike!
MARINE 3
Mount up!
MARINE 4
Go go!
Bravo Two begin driving away.
CHRISTESON
You know what? We were just fighting actual guerrillas.
STAFFORD
Screwby.
FICK
[into radio] Hitman, Hitman, this is Hitman Two. Do you copy? Over?
FICK
[on radio] Hitman, Hitman, this is Hitman Two. We've suppressed an RPG team. How
copy? Over.
PATTERSON
[on radio] Hitman Actual, this is Assassin Actual. Be advised, we are taking inaccurate
fire from the northeast.
FICK
[into radio] Hitman, Hitman, this is Hitman Two. Do you copy? Over.
Wynn stops sharply.
WYNN
Son of a bitch!
FICK
Why are they stopping?
Bravo Two's vehicles have halted, and the Marines get out and form a perimeter around
the vehicles. They are being shot at by the nearby town.
FICK
Fuck.
Fick gets out of his vehicle and runs up to Colbert's position.
FICK
Why the fuck did you stop?
COLBERT
Bravo Three got an order from Hitman.
FICK
I didn't receive any such order.
COLBERT
Sir, this is contrary to our SOP. We're bunched up in the open, and that town is
definitely hostile.
FICK
[into radio] Hitman, this is Hitman Two. Do you copy? [to Colbert] Damn it, Hitman
is not on comms.
Kocher runs up.
FICK
[to Kocher] Do you have any information, Sergeant? Why aren't we in a defensive
position?
KOCHER
Sir, all I know is that Hitman ordered my platoon to stop. This is his goat roadie.
McGraw runs over.
MCGRAW
Jesus Christ, Nate. You're alive.
FICK
Dave, what the fuck is going on?
MCGRAW
You were taken out by an RPG team. Gunny Wynn's dead. If you need a ride, Nate,
mi casa es su casa.
FICK
We've stopped based on an erroneous report. No one in Bravo Two was hit.
Wynn runs up.
WYNN
Hell are we doing here?
MCGRAW
This is the type of Vietnam shit that gets a whole company wiped out!
ESPERA
Sir, I am worried that there are people in that ville trying to organize a mass
RPG attack against us. I think my concerns are reasonable.
PATRICK
[OS] Sir, you want us to set up a sniper position?
MCGRAW
Nate? Nate?
PATRICK
[running over] Sir, do you want us to set up a sniper position?
FICK
[to Colbert] Push your security out farther. Let's make the best of this.
COLBERT
Yes, sir.
FICK
I'm gonna find the Captain.
The group begins to disperse.
COLBERT
[OS] Trombley, punch out twenty!
ESPERA
[into radio] Leon, Christopher, punch out twenty!
MARINE
Go go go go!
Lovell checks on the distance of a nearby palm grove by Schwetje's postion.
SCHWETJE
[OS] I'm gonna call this one in right now.
LOVELL
Sir, that's a cunt hair over 200 meters, sir. That's danger-close for artillery.
SCHWETJE
Danger-close?
PATRICK
[on radio] Hitman Two Three, this is Hitman Two Two. Break…
Lovell gets out his military dictionary.
LOVELL
Sir, danger-close is an artillery strike within six hundred meters of a friendly
position.
BRYAN
That would be us.
LOVELL
Two hundred meters, that's pretty much on top of our heads.
BRYAN
Dumb motherfucker, sir. Even the most boot-fucked Marine knows danger-close.
GRIEGO
You're way outta line.
FICK
[walking over] Skipper! What the fuck is going on here? You weren't on your comms.
SCHWETJE
I'm calling in a fire mission.
BRYAN
Sir, I don't like this. These two get their fucking heads together, it's fucking
dangerous! It's the oldest play in the book. Officers calling in danger-close fire
missions to get medals.
GRIEGO
Lieutenant Fick, you need to square these shitbirds away. You need to NJP that man.
Fick runs over to Schwetje and puts his hand on Schwetje's radio.
FICK
Sir, tell me exactly what you're doing.
SCHETJWE
I'm calling in a fire mission on a hunter-killer RPG team.
FICK
There is no RPG team. I called it in, my men destroyed it.
GRIEGO
Lieutenant, it doesn't matter if we're right or wrong. You and your man can't disobey
orders. An officer who does needs to be relieved of his command!
FICK
Sir, I'm merely trying to pass you accurate information. There is no hunter-killer
RPG team.
Fick removes his hand from Schwetje's radio.
FICK
What is your order, sir?
SCHWETJE
I'm calling in a fire mission, at Papa Quebec 0-5-9 0-9-8 0-3-8 degrees. Two hundred
meters.
FICK
Aye aye, sir.
Fick begins walking away from Schwetje back towards the Humvees.
SCHWETJE
[into radio] Steel Rain, Steel Rain, this is Hitman. Fire mission. Over.
STEEL RAIN
[on radio] Hitman, Hitman, this is Steel Rain. Fire mission, out.
LOVELL
Sir, should we dig in for the fire mission?
FICK
There won't be a fire mission.
SCHWETJE
[into radio] Grid Papa Quebec 0-5-9 0-9-8, over.
FICK
Hitman's using the wrong protocols.
BRYAN
What?
STEEL RAIN
[on radio] Grid Papa Quebec 0-5-9 0-9-8, out.
LOVELL
Hitman has the grids all designated wrong. There won't be a fire mission.
BRYAN
There's a switch. For once our asses get saved by sheer incompetence.
SCHWETJE
[into radio] RPG team in the open.
STEEL RAIN
[on radio] RPG team in the open, out.
SCHWETJE
[into radio] OT direction 2-0-3-8 degrees.
Fick walks back to the Humvees.
Alpha observes the town.
STEEL RAIN
[on radio] Hitman, this is Steel Rain. Reconfirm grid zone designator.
SCHETJWE
[on radio] Um, what do you mean?
STEEL RAIN
[on radio] Standby, Hitman. Break, break. Assassin, this is Steel Rain. Your grid
zone designators are correct. Message to observer: Papa Uniform 1-4-9 2-1-3, Bravo,
five guns, one round, HE delay in effect. Target number Juliet November 1-0-0-1.
Splash in five seconds.
PATTERSON
Five seconds to splash down!
A bomb hits the town. A second one flows.
BARRETT
Sir, two hits. Suspected Ba'ath party headquarters.
PATTERSON
That's a lot of ordinance we just dropped in the middle of a city. I'm worried about
civilian casualties.
Bravo Two observes the town from behind a wall as they continue to be shot at. Through
his binoculars, Person sees smoke rising from where the bomb hit. Prayer can be
heard broadcasting in the background.
PERSON
Hey, looks like Alpha hit something with that.
ESPERA
[OS] I guess it pays to have the right protocols when you call in a fire mission.
Bravo Two continues to be shot at.
COLBERT
I don't see any muzzle flashes.
TROMBLEY
Why do we have to see them?
COLBERT
Trombley, shut up.
PERSON
I got flashes!
COLBERT
Where?
PERSON
[OS] Uh, two hundred meters. My eleven o'clock! Uh, second story, white building
with the sandbags on the roof. Two buildings behind the roadblock.
COLBERT
Yeah, I got it! His head's bobbing. We're cleared to engage.
PERSON
Right on, right on!
Bravo Two opens up on the town.
HASSER
Die, fucker! Die, die!
PERSON
[OS] Is that it?
MARINE 2
[OS] Nice!
HASSER
It worked. It worked!
PERSON
Damn, sucker. I just got some. Look at me, Brad. I'm a man now. Just like you. Except,
I don't look like a faggot and talk all educated.
Colbert walks away.
COLBERT
Watch your sectors.
Espera takes Colbert's place. Person blows him a kiss.
Wright hides behind the wheel of a Humvee. Fick walks up.
FICK
Most people in America right now probably think of Iraq as a dangerous country.
Now, if I were to stand up, I might get killed. But to us, behind this wheel, it's
pretty safe. So to us, Iraq is a safe country. Right here. I feel pretty safe. Do
you feel safe?
WRIGHT
Pretty safe, I guess.
FICK
See? It's all relative.
LAVs roll past. Fick runs over to Colbert's position.
COLBERT
The natives are getting restless.
FICK
Prayer is a good thing. Maybe it'll keep them too preoccupied to shoot at us.
COLBERT
Sir, the scuttlebutt I'm hearing says you may be relieved of command.
FICK
There could be an investigation.
COLBERT
For trying to unfuck Hitman when he is about to drop arty on his own fucking company?
That's brilliant. Sir, your leadership is the only thing I have absolute confidence
in.
FICK
I'm assured that I'll have the right to address any allegations before anything
is formalized. I'm assured of this.
COLBERT
Sir, to highlight my growing lack of confidence in the strategic plan, can you explain
why we are strong-pointing this hostile city in tin-plated Humvees, while M-1 tanks,
LAVs, and Amtracs roll past? Isn't it supposed to be the other way around? I mean,
how exactly did this happen?
FICK
You wouldn't believe it if I told you. Make sure to conserve your fire. It's gonna
be a long night.
Fick walks away.
Reyes and Patrick observe the town.
REYES
There's no plan for this, Pap.
PATRICK
For what?
REYES
Strong-pointing a walled town with Humvees. It all feels so random, what we're doing.
Running here, shooting. Running there, bombing. That might be a legit target burning
over there, but it might be a school, Pap. I hope it's legit. I hope this is good
karma. [pauses] Everything here is ancient, Pap. We're in an old, old place.
PATRICK
Yep. [spits]
[00:23:34]
Alpha watch Iraqis walking out of the town, waving white flags.
PATTERSON
White flag.
BARRETT
Hmm, could be some Habudabu trickster shit.
The Iraqis approach Alpha's position. One of them is carrying a wounded child in
his arms.
PATTERSON
Let's go.
Alpha go up to meet them.
IRAQI FATHER
Help, please. Help!
MARINE 1
Corpsman! Get the Corpsman!
IRAQI FATHER
Saddam. Fedayeen shoot. Not you. Saddam. You kill Ba'ath party. Saddam. Very good.
Saddam in our city, shooting at you, not us. We help. Come. I'll show you. Come
PATTERSON
Okay.
BARRETT
Captain!
PATTERSON
Call battalion.
BARRETT
Battalion's on the net. Godfather wants to see you.
PATTERSON
Keep a handle on this till I get back.
BARRETT
Yes, sir.
Ferrando holds a command meeting.
FERRANDO
In Ar Rifa, this commander taught us something about seizing the initiative. Earlier
today, when his company came under attack by Fedayeen paramilitary forces, laying
in ambush with RPGs, he chose to stop, and bring the fight to them. [Patterson walks
up.] Captain Patterson, greetings.
PATTERSON
Sir. I need the translator. We just knocked out the Ba'ath headquarthers. We have
an opportunity to-
FERRANDO
There's a school of thought that says we shouldn't have stopped, particularly given
the proximity to a hostile city. But this kind of aggressiveness is what I mean
by interrupting the enemy's own decision-making cycle. It's against all doctrine,
but as the General often reminds me, doctrine is the last refuge of the unimaginative.
The fact is I just got off the nets with Chaos, and the General is impressed with
our initiative. We are on his radar screen. Gentlemen, we're coming out from beneath
all this ass and getting back into the game. And he's given us a tasker. [points
to map] This is the Qal'at Sukkar airfield. A British paratroop regiment is staging
to hit the field at dawn. The General has advised me, that they're running late.
And he suggested, if we're up for it, that we can get to the field first. To do
this, we have to cross forty klicks. Godfather needs an airfield.
PATTERSON
Sir? We have good intelligence from the locals on the Ba'athist and Republican guard
units in this town. We can exploit the information-
FERRANDO
There's no time. We're pulling outta here in the next hour. See to it, gentlemen.
The meeting disperses.
An Iraqi man talks to Fick as Meesh walks up.
IRAQI MAN
All you find, we find. [Arabic]…together. [Arabic]
FICK
Meesh, seriously, what is this guy trying to tell me?
MEESH
Eee, they are glad to be liberated.
FICK
Okay, I got that. But what is he trying to tell me right now?
MEESH
They want to show us the locations of the Republican guard, Ba'ath party and Fedayeen
forces. Maybe some weapon caches, maybe some chemical weapons.
FICK
Okay then. It looks like we got our work cut out for us. Tell this man he's going
to come with us. Tell him I'm going to take him back to talk to-
MEESH
No no no no no. That's not how we're rolling, eh? We are pulling out of here soon.
But rest assured, Godfather has a legit plan to exploit the situation. [hands the
Iraqi man a briefcase] We are going to give these righteous people IR chem lights.
They are going to set them up where the bad guys are and mark them for the bombers
who are going to bomb the shit out of whatever's marked. American Air Force. The
best in the world.
FICK
How do we know this guy isn't just going to put these chem lights on the homes of
people he owes money to? How do we know for sure that he's even on our side, Meesh?
How do we know anything unless, unless we properly debrief these people and check
their intel?
MEESH
[offers Fick a bottle of beer] Here.
FICK
No thanks, Meesh.
Fick walks away.
MEESH
Okay, it's not the good shit, but it's local brewed.
Meesh gets another bottle from a nearby child.
[00:27:43]
The battalion drives away from Ar Rifa.
[00:27:54]
Nighttime. The battalion is stopped.
PERSON
Oh. You should write this down, Reporter. See, the war's actually not about pussy.
It's about NAMBLA. You know, North American Man-Boy Love Association. See, places
like Thailand where they used to fuck little boys and shit, they're drying up.
FICK
[on radio] All Hitman Two victors…
PERSON
We're opening up Iraq for a whole new supply of kids, man.
COLBERT
Ray, please!
PATRICK
[on radio] Hitman Two this is Hitman Two Two…
COLBERT
I'm trying to gauge the approach to our target.
PERSON
Right! 'Cause we're going to drive forty klicks off-road, in the dark, to an airfield
with Republican Guard on it, by ourselves. And they say that I did too much acid
in high school. Christ. The business end of Mattis's crack pipe must be hot to the
fucking touch. Brad, listen, there's no way that we can go forty klicks here-
COLBERT
Get down!
PERSON
Why?
COLBERT
Get down!
Everyone ducks down as shots ring out.
TROMBLEY
[OS] What?
PATRICK
[OS] Hold your fire! Hold your fire!
TROMBLEY
Holy fuck.
COLBERT
Give me your headset.
(In the background:
GARZA
[OS] Why are we always hating on the Mexicans?
ESPERA
[OS] Anybody hit?
LILLEY
[OS] Lilley's up!)
COLBERT
[into radio] Hitman Two, this is Two One. That is a friendly unit northbound on
the MSR firing on our position.
(In the background:
ESPERA
Leon!
LEON
I'm good!)
COLBERT
[into radio] I say again, that is blue on blue fire.
(In the background:
ESPERA
Everybody's cool?
GARZA
I'm ok, Sergeant.)
COLBERT
[into radio] They're northbound towards Assassin's position. How copy?
PERSON
Those are fucking reservists! I saw the markings.
FICK
[on radio] Hitman Two One, this is Hitman Two, copy.
COLBERT
You alright?
FICK
[on radio] I'm rolling to Assassin's position.
WRIGHT
Yeah, I think so.
TROMBLEY
I'm fucking wet! [to Wright] Hey! Hey! Did you piss on me? Don't fucking tell me
I have reporter piss on me!
PERSON
Brad, they shot our fucking water cans.
SCHWETJE
[on radio] All Hitman victors are Oscar Mike.
COLBERT
We're Oscar Mike.
They start driving.
PERSON
Damn it. Forty klicks, no fucking water.
TROMBLEY
Fuck it, at least you're dry.
FERRANDO
[on radio] All victors, this is Godfather. Stand by, H&S has a truck down.
COLBERT
Stop.
Ray stops the vehicle.
PERSON
Start! Stop! Start! Stop! Jesus! I'm beginning to think Godfather's just a big cocktease.
Colbert gets out of the Humvee and begins walking to the downed truck.
MARINE 1
[OS] I can't believe they shot a hole in our fucking tire.
COLBERT
You guys all right?
MARINE 1
That was some bullshit, trigger happy reservists.
TORKLESON
Hey Iceman. Can you believe those fucking reservists? They just shot us up.
MARINE 1
It was shock trauma. A bunch of fucking doctors. Didn't they have to take an oath
or some shit against fucking people up?
COLBERT
You need some security while you do this. I'll get with the LT-
Sixta walks up.
SIXTA
Belay that, devil dog! Godfather's gots a mission, and that mission is now! Abandon
this vehicle, put your asses on another vehicle. Let's get moving.
TORKLESON
[OS] But, Sergeant-
SIXTA
No buts! These asses ain't in gear ten minutes ago, you's in direct disobedience
of a direct order from Godfather hisself!
COLBERT
What are you carrying?
TORKLESON
Battalion's chow, M-16's, ammo, four hundred pounds of C-4, couple of cases of Claymore
mines, all kind of shit like that.
SIXTA
Torklesen! Get your bubbies in a running truck and load up right now. You hear me?
[00:30:55]
The battalion continues moving towards Qal'at Sukkar.
FICK
[on radio] Two One, this is Hitman Two. Interrogative, where is the turn? Over.
COLBERT
[on radio] Hitman Two, this is Two One, it's coming right up, one zero zero meters,
over.
FICK
[on radio] Two One, it better be, I can assure you that Godfather's watching.
COLBERT
Dude, I am so lost right now.
PERSON
Don't worry about it buddy, I know where we're going. We passed seven villages,
there's one more. Hey, do you remember the gay dog episode of South Park? The one
where uh Sparky runs away 'cause he's humping all those other dogs and shit?
COLBERT
Yes, Ray I ... I do remember it very well. But I don't see what relevance this has
on our present status.
PERSON
There's the hamlet, our turn.
COLBERT
[into radio] Hitman Two, this is Two One, we're making that turn now, over.
FICK
[on radio] Roger that. Nice job, over.
PERSON
Hey, Brad? Do your Big Gay Al for me. Come on, buddy! Do it for your old pal Ray,
the one who made the right turn!
BRAD
[imitating Big Gay Al] Well, hello there little pup! I'm Big Gay Al. Have you been
outcast?
PERSON
[laughs] Fuck, yeah.
TROMBLEY
They had this gay bar open up in the town where I'm from in Michigan, and people
trashed it every night. They had to close it after a month.
PERSON
But, see, there's money in that, Trombley. Did I tell you I'm gonna open my own
gay bar when I get back home? It's gonna be called The Golden Stream, and it's gonna
be like this, big urinal, right? And there's gonna be this two-way mirror that everybody
pisses against. That way, when you're sitting at the bar having drinks, there's
like all these big fucking giant cocks just pissing right at you.
TROMBLEY
Corporal, are you a faggot?
PERSON
You know what? I'm gonna franchise that shit. You can have Michigan, Trombley. Very
lucrative territory, homosexually speaking.
TROMBLEY
That's not funny, Corporal Person.
COLBERT
Ray, give it a rest.
ESPERA
[into radio] Echo Five Charlie, Echo Five Charlie, this is Echo Five Echo. Interrogative,
how much further to the airfield?
COLBERT
[on radio] Echo Five Echo, I don't copy.
GARZA
Sergeant?
ESPERA
What?
GARZA
I just lost my helmet.
ESPERA
What do you wanna do, hold a funeral?
GARZA
Sergeant?
ESPERA
We ain't going back for it, Gabe.
PERSON
[singing] Sometimes I feel I've got to [pauses, looks at Brad]
Run away, I've got to-
Person points at Colbert. Colbert claps his hand twice.
PERSON
[singing] Get away from the pain you drive into the heart of me.
Take my tears and that's not nearly all.
PERSON, COLBERT
[singing] Oh, tainted love
TROMBLEY
[singing] Ohhaaaohhhh
PERSON, COLBERT
[singing] Tainted love.
TROMBLEY
[singing] Ohhaaaohhhh
PERSON, COLBERT, WRIGHT
[singing] Don't touch me please,
I cannot stand the way you tease!
Oh, I love you but you hurt me so.
TROMBLEY
[singing] Ohhaaaohhhh
PERSON, COLBERT, WRIGHT
[singing] Oh, tainted love.
[00:34:00]
Daytime. The battalion continues driving.
[00:34:07]
First Recon has stopped while waiting for Alpha to recon the airfield.
FERRANDO
Get me General Mattis.
ECKLOFF
[into radio] Chaos Actual, this is Godfather. Stand by for traffic, over.
MATTIS
[on radio] Roger. Send traffic, over.
ECKLOFF
Sir, we got Chaos on the net.
Eckloff hands the radio to Ferrando.
FERRANDO
[into radio] Chaos, this is Godfather. Teams are out now getting eyes on the field.
Break. We'll have complete sitrep for you within five mikes. How copy, over.
MATTIS
[on radio] Solid copy.
FERRANDO
[into radio] Roger that. Out. [to the Command staff] Chaos is waiting. Brits are
in the air. But our U-2 surveillance picked up four possible T-72 tanks on the Iraqi
field. If our eyes affirm this intel, Chaos needs to abort the British assault.
They hit the point of no return in under thirty mikes, so where the fuck are my
eyes on that field?
ECKLOFF
[into radio] Assassin Actual, Godfather needs your sitrep ASAP, over.
PATTERSON
[on radio] Roger that, stand by.
Alpha Two Three halts on its way to the airfield.
PATTERSON
[on radio] Assassin Two Three, this is Assassin Actual, how copy?
FAWCETT
[into radio] Assassin, this is Assassin Two Three. We are one klick out, forty mikes
from objective. I say again, four zero mikes, over.
PATTERSON
[into radio] Roger.
Eckloff hangs up the radio and addresses Godfather.
ECKLOFF
Alpha's forty mikes away from getting eyes on the field.
FERRANDO
These guys have bitched and moaned, moaned and bitched that I haven't given them
a legitimate recon mission. I finally give them one, and they fucking fail me. We
don't have that option. We will recon that field. We will recon it in force. I want
the entire battalion Oscar Mike inside of ten minutes.
Sixta nods and runs off.
ECKLOFF
Sir, that's not a reconnaissance mission. That's an assault.
FERRANDO
Semantics.
ECKLOFF
What about the T-72s?
FERRANDO
The violence of action is to our advantage. I'll request that Division adjust the
ROE accordingly.
ECKLOFF
Roger that, sir. [into radio] Assassian Actual, this is Godfather. Abort that mission.
RTB.
PATTERSON
[on radio] Interrogative, you want me to return to base?
ECKLOFF
[on radio] Affirmative.
[00:37:44]
Wright, Person, and Colbert sleep in the Humvee while Trombley keeps watch.
WYNN
[on radio] All Hitman Two gunners, be advised. Alpha has a team re-entering friendly
lines to the north. How copy?
JACKS
[on radio] Hitman Two, this is Hitman Two-Two. Roger that.
Fick walks up.
FICK
Brad?
Fick shakes Colbert awake.
FICK
Get your team ready. We're assaulting the airfield. Less than ten mikes.
Fick leaves.
COLBERT
[shaking Person] Wake up. Walt, range the Mark-19 as far out as you feel comfortable
engaging targets with good effect.
HASSER
What about Alpha's recon?
COLBERT
They're out of time.
PERSON
[OS] Oh, I'm up.
COLBERT
They fucked it. We're going up against tanks.
MARINE 1
[OS] Let's go! Mount up!
MARINE 2
[OS] Hey, grab a diesel. Let's mount up!
CHAFFIN
It's on race. Two-Two's up.
PERSON
[OS] Young man, if you have to do number one, go now, because once I start the car,
I am not stopping.
LILLEY
[filming] Naked Marine, the internet loves you!
TROMBLEY
[OS] Fuck you, Person.
ESPERA
[OS] Lilley!
COLBERT
[OS] Trombley, get your ass back in the vehicle.
ESPERA
[OS] Where's Lilley? Lilley! [addressing Lilley] Lilley, we're Oscar Mike, man.
Move it.
REYES
[OS] Pappy, we're Oscar Mike!
ESPERA
You really are gay, aren't you?
LILLEY
Brah, you are not cool.
(In the background:
MARINE 1
[OS] … you'd better give me a minute.
MARINE 2
[OS] If you guys would quit bitchin' about it… )
The battalion begins to drive away.
[00:37:31]
In Patterson's vehicle.
ECKLOFF
[on radio] This is Godfather. Godfather Actual has declared all Iraqis hostile in
proximity to the objective. How copy? Over.
PATTERSON
[in radio] Affirmative. Copy that. [to Barrett] Godfather just changed the rules
of engagement. He's lowered the bar. Shit. He's removed the bar. New ROE has all
Iraqis on or near that airfield declared hostile.
BARRETT
Free-fire zone?
PATTERSON
I'm not passing that word. Keep this change in the ROE off our net.
In Colbert's vehicle.
COLBERT
Got any comms with those A-10's?
PERSON
Negative.
COLBERT
Those jets are goddamn Air Force. They shoot Marines.
PERSON
You know that map showed fences. If there's fences, we're going to need the bolt
cutters.
COLBERT
They're under the reporter's seat.
PERSON
Hey, can you lift your ass in a hurry if we need to get to those bolt cutters?
WRIGHT
Uh, I think so. [moves around trying to reach the bolt cutters] Ow.
COLBERT
You have to get out of the Humvee to open it.
WRIGHT
Um-
COLBERT
I don't see a fence anyway.
WRIGHT
[OS] Uh, do you need them now?
PERSON
Charlie just cleared a guard tower.
WRIGHT
'Cause I-
HASSER
No!
COLBERT
What is it, Walt?
HASSER
Fucking shit! Mark-19's jammed!
COLBERT
[on radio] Hitman Two, this is Two One. Our Mark-19 is down. I say again, our main
gun is down.
HASSER
Shit!
COLBERT
Either unfuck it now or get on your fucking SAW.
HASSER
I'm trying!
TROMBLEY
I see men running, two hundred meters, ten o'clock.
COLBERT
Are they armed?
TROMBLEY
They're something.
COLBERT
Well, the order is that everyone is declared hostile. Light 'em the fuck up.
Trombley fires a burst towards the men.
TROMBLEY
Oh, shooting motherfuckers like it's cool! [fires another burst] Fuck!
MARINE (SCHWETJE?)
[on radio] All right gents, keep your heads on a swivel. Maintain your dispersion.
MARINE (SCHWETJE?)
[on radio] Everybody stay on a line.
FICK
[on radio] All Hitman Two victors, maintain dispersion. Target building five hundred
meters ahead. Break. Hitman Three is holding our flank. Over.
COLBERT
[on radio] Hitman Two, this is TwoOne. I have two tanks, northwest side of the warehouse.
Over.
The battalion begins driving onto the airfield. Guns open up.
FICK
[on radio] This is Hitman Two. Affirmative.
COLBERT
[on radio] They appear to be stationary. No personnel.
LOVELL
[on radio] Hitman Two, this is Hitman Two Three. I have an unmanned ZPU-57 TAC-2
appears to be abandoned. Over.
FICK
[on radio] Two Three, this is Two. Copy that.
The Humvees halt.
COLBERT
[watching McGraw] He's got his fucking bayonet out.
McGraw gets out of his vehicle and begins firing.
COLBERT
[OS] Doing his Rambo.
MCGRAW
Follow my tracers!
REDMAN
He's shooting at scraps of metal.
PERSON
Can you believe that fucking retard is in charge of people?
COLBERT
Jesus Christ.
McGraw runs back to Kocher's Humvee and points at a distant hamlet.
MCGRAW
Engage those buildings!
REDMAN
Sir, that's more than three thousand meters away. Range of my fifty is 1830.
MCGRAW
Move into position. Engage! Engage!
McGraw runs away.
REDMAN
Should I light them up?
KOCHER
Nah, we're not engaging. Those aren't military buildings. They're civilian huts.
[00:40:52]
The battalion is camped on the airfield after securing it.
PERSON
Yeah, looks like Saddam's big bad Republican Guard Hajjis got wind I was coming.
As the great warrior poet Ice Cube once said, “If the day does not require an AK,
it is good.”
COLBERT
They stick around and manned those, we'd have been dead before we even saw them.
Some Marines climb around on the abandoned Iraqi tanks.
(In the background:
MARINE 1
Take a picture of me…
MARINE 2
Get one of me. I'm much better looking than Steve.
MARINE 1
Get the fuck out of here.)
PERSON
Dude, lighten up!
COLBERT
Then again the world wouldn't have to deal with the prospect of you returning to
your cretinous daughter-fucking trailer-park red-state shithole, and producing mutant,
Whiskey Tango, scrotum-faced, bucktoothed, zit-exploding progeny.
Ferrando walks up behind Colbert.
TROMBLEY
Heads up.
FERRANDO
I need a channel to division main.
COLBERT
Lance Corporal Trombley, Channel five. [hands the radio to Ferrando] Sir.
FERRANDO
[into radio] Chaos, this is Godfather.
MATTIS
[on radio] Send it.
FERRANDO
[into radio] Be advised. We have seized the enemy airfield. Early reports are we've
captured several enemy tanks and self-propelled triple-A batteries. It appears that
we've overrun the entire 255th Mechanized Regiment, who have fled. And sir, we've
sustained zero casualties.
MATTIS
[on radio] Outstanding.
FERRANDO
[into radio] Thank you. Roger that. Out.
Ferrando returns the radio and begins to walk away. Wright watches some planes fly
by overhead.
WRIGHT
Is that the British paratroopers?
FERRANDO
No. We scrubbed their mission. We got here first.
COLBERT
Gentlemen. We just seized an airfield.
(In the background:
MARINE 1
Hey what's in there? Can you see inside?
MARINE 2
Whole bunch of dirt.)
COLBERT
That was pretty fucking ninja.
[00:42:34]
Doc Bryan examines the Marines.
ESPERA
[OS] Christopher! Get some dried camel shit for the fire…
BRYAN
Just keep it dry, eh?
REYES
I know they're heinous, bro. I'm living in it.
Bryan and Jacks groan as Chaffin takes off his boots.
BRYAN
Oh!
JACKS
Holy fuck.
BRYAN
Jesus!
CHAFFIN
That feels good.
JACKS
Smells like dick juice.
BRYAN
When's the last time you took your boot off and gave your paw some air?
CHAFFIN
Come on, Doc, give it a rest. You know we can't. They ordered us to sleep in the
damn things.
Fick and Wynn walk up to Lovell and Patrick.
FICK
Got some good news. We're so far ahead of RCT One, we'll be here a good twenty-four
hours before they show up. However, there is a bit of concern in some quarters about
being overrun, since we don't really know what's around us out here, so make sure
you maintain fifty percent watch and the comms are good. We've got pre-register
on-call artillery if we want it.
PATRICK
Sir, has any thought been given to destroying the weapons and ordinance that are
sitting over there?
FICK
Actually, that did come up, but it seems the battalion's supply of C-4 is now unaccounted
for. The battalion supply truck we left last night? It is a smoldering heap of twisted
metal and failed hopes in the trustworthiness of the Iraqis we are striving so hard
to liberate.
LOVELL
What does that mean, sir?
FICK
It means we're on one meal a day.
Fick and Wynn walk away.
(In the background:
CHAFFIN
Holsey, as you people say, my feet be stanky!)
[00:43:43]
Bravo Two congregates around Two One's Humvee.
PERSON
[OS] I'm just saying I'm surprised is all, Brad. I mean, aren't you surprised?
COLBERT
Shut the fuck up.
PERSON
I mean I'm betting that they were thinking that they could just, you know, leave
a fully-loaded supply truck laying around, just like you could anywhere in America,
you know? I mean, you park your unlocked car in Detroit or Baltimore, I mean, your
shit's gonna be there guaranteed when you get back from the day spa with your skin
all exfoliated and shit, right? I mean, seriously, homes, why would our Iraqi brethren
want four hundred pounds of C-4, claymores, and crates of M-16s? I mean, it just
doesn't make any sense. Oh, wait! You know, they could be using all that C-4 for,
like, a giant 4th of July celebration. What do you think, Brad?
COLBERT
I think it's time for you to shut the fuck up.
Burris and Scott walk up.
BURRIS
Hey, nice job shooting those camels, Trombley.
TROMBLEY
Uh, I think I shot one of those Iraqis, too. I saw him fall.
SCOTT
All we saw was camels going down.
BURRIS
Camel-killer.
TROMBLEY
Look, I didn't mean to shoot innocent camels, all right? I'm sure I shot people.
COLBERT
Shouldn't you two be doing the after-action report on Alpha's failed recon mission?
Burris and Scott walk away. Sixta walks up.
SIXTA
[to Garza] What's this about you losing your Kevlar?
GARZA
It bounced off my head, Sergeant Major. Last night.
SIXTA
Bounced off your head?
GARZA
I was up on the .50-cal and the Humvee went over a berm, Sergeant Major.
SIXTA
That Kevlar wasn't yours to lose! That was the property of this United States Marine
Corps! It belonged to every Marine! 'Cause of your failure to secure that helmet,
you've jeopardized every Marine serving today! I was considering NJP'ing your ass.
[turning to Colbert] Sergeant Colbert! This is what happens when you don't enforce
the grooming standards. The mens gets all lax, and then other standards fall. Devil
Dog here stops using his chinstrap, goes over a bump, Kevlar goes flying off his
head, and our protective posture is weakened.
COLBERT
Roger that, Sergeant Major.
Sixta winks and walks away.
GARZA
I'm not the fucking retard who lost a whole supply truck.
Person laughs.
[00:46:18]
Two Iraqi women approach the camp, dragging a litter behind him.
MARINE
[OS] Gimme any target, I'll get anything out to seven hundred yards.
WRIGHT
What are they dragging? Think they want something?
CHAFFIN
One humanitarian ration for two blowjobs, that's the going rate in this part of
the world.
BRYAN
Stiney, give me a hand.
BEDOUIN WOMAN 1
[loud, distraught Arabic]
Bryan approaches the women.
BRYAN
Stop.
BEDOUIN WOMAN 1
[loud, distraught Arabic]
BEDOUIN WOMAN 2
[comforting Arabic]
Bryan looks down at the liter and sees an injured boy.
BRYAN
Hey, buddy. Can you hear me? Good.
Some Iraqi men approach carrying a boy. More of Bravo Two continue to gather around
the scene.
BEDOUIN MEN
[Arabic]
BEDOUIN WOMAN 1
[Arabic]
BRYAN
Kid's been zipped with 556. Marines shot this kid. Fucking jackasses. Trigger-happy
motherfucker.
STINETORF
Doc, is there anything I can do?
BRYAN
Yeah, Stiney, get me the battalion surgeon. We need to casevac this kid, or he's
dead.
STINETORF
Done.
Stinetorf runs off.
STINETORF
[OS] Christensen, Stafford, two stretchers to Doc, twelve o'clock.
BRYAN
You're a very brave kid. He's very strong, all right?
CHRISTESON
[OS] Doc.
BRYAN
Yeah?
CHRISTESON
[OS] He's been hit by a 556. Blew out his calf muscle but there's no arterial bleeding.
He'll make it.
Wright and Meesh walk up.
BRYAN
Roger that.
WRIGHT
Why aren't they angry?
MEESH
They are grateful to be liberated and welcome the Americans as friends. These mistakes
are unavoidable in war.
BRYAN
Bullshit! We're fucking Recon Marines. Our whole fucking job is to observe, not
make these kinds of mistakes. And we don't fucking shoot unarmed kids.
WRIGHT
Where did this happen?
MEESH
[Arabic]
Fick, Aubin, and Stinetorf approach.
BEDOUIN MEN
[Arabic]
MEESH
Dude, they were tending their camels and shit, so who knows where it was.
STAFFORD
Fuck, man. Trombley did this.
BRYAN
[to Aubin] Sir, priority one surgical pediatric, four bullet wounds to the abdomen.
144 tach weak, 30 rest, 90 over palp. He's stable for now.
FICK
Godfather's denied the request to casevac the boy.
BRYAN
Well, we need to casevac him, or he's dead.
Colbert walks up.
AUBIN
I'll go ask the battalion commander again.
BRYAN
Thank you, sir.
BEDOUIN WOMAN 1
[to Colbert, distraught Arabic]
BRYAN
[OS] Shot by that asshole, Trombley, Brad. He's been zipped by 556 from Trombley's
SAW.
COLBERT
Don't put this on Trombley. I'm responsible.
BRYAN
Yeah? Well, twenty other Marines rolled by them and didn't shoot. So why don't we
bring Trombley here and see what he's done.
COLBERT
Don't say that, it was my order. What can I do here?
BRYAN
Not a fucking thing apparently, Brad.
Aubin runs back.
FICK
There's gotta be something we can do.
AUBIN
Under the rules, we have to provide him with care until he dies.
BRYAN
Yeah, well so?
AUBIN
Put him in my care. I'm billeted next to the battalion commander. If he's in my
care and Godfather has to watch him die, he might change his order.
BRYAN
Right, let's do this.
FICK
It's the only chance we've got.
BRYAN
All right, on three. Gentle. Ready? One, two, three.
They lift the stretcher carrying the boy.
BRYAN
Ready? Let's go.
Bravo Two carries the two Iraqi boys across the camp to the Command tent. Trombley
watches from beside his Humvee.
Bravo Two arrive with the boys outside Ferrando's tent. Sixta comes out.
SIXTA
What the hell is going on here?
BRYAN
We brought him here to die.
Eckloff comes out.
SIXTA
Gets him the fuck out of here.
FICK
Stafford.
STINTORF
Set him down over here.
The rest of Bravo Two carry the liters to a nearby tent.
Ferrando comes out.
FERRANDO
Sergeant Major, what the fuck is going on?
SIXTA
Sir. Bravo Two in rebellion because they thinks they shot an Iraqi child.
STINTORF
Does he want water? Keep him still.
FERRANDO
You're requesting that I send this wounded civilian to the RCT for aid. Problem.
Our tactical situation is extremely precarious here. These are the northernmost
Marines' positions and we are thirty klicks north of that. We are far behind enemy
lines. We have incomplete intel as to the position of the Iraqi units [gesturing
towards a map] here, here, and here. We don't even know what happened to the four
thousand troops that were at this airfield six hours ago. And there's only 350 of
us. What can be done? Option one, casevac by helicopter, doesn't exist. Army, Marines
are engaged, taking casualties. Last night, the Iraqis stopped the Army advance.
They turned back thirty-six Apache helicopters. Shot a few down. Option two, I detach
a platoon and have them drive thirty klicks through enemy lines to the shock-trauma
unit here. If any of you were a casualty right now, I don't think I could casevac
you. But supposing I could. I imagine there's some of you think we have to give
wounded civilians every consideration we would give ourselves. That is not true.
The ROE say we have to give them the same medical care they would get by local standards.
The standards here are fucking zero. It's a shitty situation for us, but nobody
put a gun to our heads and forced us to come here. We're all volunteers. [to Eckloff]
Get me Captain Patterson.
ECKLOFF
Yes, sir. [into radio] Assasin Actual, this is Godfather Five.
PATTERSON
[on radio] Godfather Five, this is Assassin Actual. Send traffic.
EKLOFF
[into radio] DX on the net. Over.
PATTERSON
[on radio] Standing by.
FERRANDO
I'm dispatching an Alpha platoon to take this child to the shock-trauma unit.
[00:54:03]
Nighttime. Wynn and Fick walk up to Two One Alpha's Humvee.
WYNN
Huddle up, we're gonna talk.
COLBERT
Ray.
CHAFFIN
[on radio] This is Echo Four Charlie. Who's on Two One Bravo's gun?
MARINE
[on radio] Echo Three Lima is up on Two One Bravo.
FICK
We made a mistake today, collectively and individually. We must get past this. Can't
sit around and call it quits now. We have fighting ahead.
WYNN
Hey, look, guys, we're Americans. We must make sure when we take a shot that we
are threatened. You gotta see that these people are just like you. You got to see
past the huts, the camels, the different clothes they wear. These are people in
this fucking country. This family here might lose a son. We shot their camels, too.
One camel could be a year's income to them. We're not here to destroy their way
of life.
FICK
Trombley, you have to be prepared for the possibility of a formal investigation
in the shooting. You need to write it up.
WYNN
Keep your head up.
Wynn and Fick walk away.
TROMBLEY
Is it going to be ok, Sergeant? I mean this investigation?
COLBERT
You'll be fine, Trombley.
TROMBLEY
No, I mean for you, Sergeant, since you gave all the orders. I don't care about
any of this, you know, I mean I'll be out in a couple of years. But you, Sergeant,
this is your career.
COLBERT
I'll be fine.
CHAFFIN
[on radio] Hitman Two Three, this is Hitman Two Two, watch my six. I'm taking a
dump.
MARINE
[on radio] Roger that.
PERSON
I don't wanna sound like I'm defending Trombley or anything, but how come nobody
remembers that they declared everybody hostile? I mean, they told us to shoot at
everybody.
HASSER
Yeah. But you know what's even more fucked up? Trombley only shot two bursts, maybe
seven rounds. I mean, we're bumping down a dirt road, his targets are like two hundred
meters out, and he hits exactly what the fuck he's shooting at. I mean, fuck man,
the boy is a cold-on, deadeye killer.
PERSON
Yeah, no shit. It's 'cause he's a psycho. But at least he's our psycho.
Wright digs his ranger grave, clearly winded. Colbert walks up.
COLBERT
You all right, reporter?
WRIGHT
Yeah, I'm just sucking wind.
COLBERT
What happened today, um… [a long pause] You need to square those walls. You'll never
make any progress digging that way.
Colbert walks away.
[00:57:55]
End credits.
[VO – all on radio]
RAPTOR
Steel Rain, this is Raptor. Adjust fire, system aided, over.
STEEL RAIN
Raptor, this is Steel Rain. Adjust fire, system aided, out.
RAPTOR
Ten digit grid November Uniform 6-7-3-1-2 0-9-5-7-1, over.
STEEL RAIN
Ten digit grid November Uniform 6-7-3-1-2 0-9-5-7-1, out.
RAPTOR
Five BMPs in the open, request splash, over.
STEEL RAIN
Five BMPs in the open, request splash, out.
STEEL RAIN
Message to observer: Charlie, two rounds, five guns in effect, target number Alpha
Bravo 1-0-0-4, over.
RAPTOR
Message to observer: Charlie two rounds, five guns in effect, target number Alpha
Bravo 1-0-0-4, out.
STEEL RAIN
Shot, over.
RAPTOR
Shot, out.
STEEL RAIN
Splash, over.
RAPTOR
Splash, out.
RAPTOR
Ten digit impact grid November Uniform 6-7-2-1-4 0-9-6-1-1, correct fire for effect,
over.
STEEL RAIN
Ten digit impact grid November Uniform 6-7-2-1-4 0-9-6-1-1, correct fire for effect,
out.
RAPTOR
Record this target, end of mission, target suppressed, over.
STEEL RAIN
Record this target, end of mission, target suppressed, out.
CHARLIE NINE TWO
Red Five, this is Charlie Nine Two. We are in sector, gunner up, scanning with thermals.
We have multiple personal with small arms. Understand we are on restricted ROEs,
over.
RED FIVE
Charlie Nine Two, this is Red Five. That is affirm. Keep a hard posture. Only prosecute
targets that are an immediate threat, over.
CHARLIE NINE TWO
Roger that, Red Five. Holding position. Stand by for further reports. Charlie Nine
Two, out.
ASSASSIN
Steel Rain, this is Assassin. SEAD, over.
STEEL RAIN
Assassin, this is Steel Rain. SEAD, out.
ASSASSIN
Grid to suppress Papa Victor 4-7-6 8-3-9, grid to mark Papa Victor 4-5-7 8-3-7,
over.
STEEL RAIN
Grid to suppress Papa Victor 4-7-6 8-3-9, grid to mark Papa Victor 4-5-7 8-3-7,
out.